Random ramblings ...

• The best condiment to put on a hamburger is mustard.

• Bacon makes almost anything taste better. A bacon cheeseburger is better than a cheeseburger. Bacon and eggs is better than just bacon. Bacon is the crack of food.

• If you can get a toad or a frog to eat some Alka-Seltzer, get away from it. Since frogs can't burp, the effervescent bubbling bicarbonate action will eventually cause them to explode.

• The best cursing is done: when dealing with bad drivers; or when you bang your shin or toe hard on some furniture.

• Men love it when a woman touches them, seemingly casually, and women use this shamelessly to get us to lift heavy objects and do unpleasant tasks.

• The Daily Show is about the best thing on television.

• I think that instead of voting people off the island in "Survivor," they should dump off 14 inmates sentenced to death and when one is voted off, they are killed. The winner doesn't get a million dollars; he/she gets their sentence commuted to life.

• It doesn't matter what anyone else says: Dogs are better pets than cats. That's not an opinion; it's fact.

• When I was growing up, mothers did insidious things to get children to eat healthy vegetables. Celery stalks got filled with peanut butter, which sometimes was then topped with raisins (ants on a log). My mom got us to eat broccoli and cauliflower by making a killer creamy cheese sauce that went with it. And even though that was the bomb with ANYTHING, the only time she made it was with vegetables.

Random Guam Facts Of The Day:
• When the Ferdinand Magellan "discovered" Guam in 1521, there were approximately 100,000 Chamorros in the Marianas Islands. By the time of a 1709 census, that number was reduced to about 3,000 — mostly from foreign disease and death in battle.

• Guam's territorial flower is the Puti Tai Nobiu (Bougainvillea).