Saturday, with the Deeze ...

Author’s note: Holy crap this is a long post! That sometimes happens with bored Saturday evenings. Enjoy!

Here’s a breakdown of DZER’s Saturday:

• 12:45 p.m.: Finally roll my lazy ass out of bed. Yeah, I went to sleep late, but I was actually up much earlier. I just went back to bed. Several times. Because, let’s face it, I’m a lazy fuck like that.

• 1:37 to 2:36 p.m.: Chat online with this super hot blonde chick who, it turns out, was very stoned. God, she's so smoking hot! I drool over her all the time. Can you blame me? Heh. Unfortunately, she ultimately ditches me to go watch “A Lot Like Love” and to eat some Cherry Garcia ice cream. Can you believe that shit? Well … I can. LOL ... Cherry Garcia is supposed to be some righteously delicious ice cream. If she would have ditched me solely for an Ashton Kutcher movie, then I would have been totally pissed! LOL ... But a stoner and her ice cream? A man understands that. Heh.

• 2:36 to 3 p.m.-ish: Fart around, getting ready to leave the apartment and getting dressed and flipping through TV channels. Wait. It gets better. Seriously. I promise. Don’t stop reading!! LOL

• 3 p.m. to 5:20 p.m.: Work. Should have gone much faster, but I waited for an Olympic official to call me back to try to get something in. Very productive time though.

• 5:20 to 6:30 p.m.: Drove around different parts of the island. At first I was going to get some food, but wasn’t really hungry. Then I was going to go to a store to get stuff for later, but decided to go check mail first, then just decided to go home, but on the way there I figured I’d use my new 5.2-megapixel camera to take some more Guam photos from a few different places so I could show off my island a bit more.

So I stopped by Fort Apugan, the remnants of a Spanish-era fort in Agana Heights, then through Maina up to Nimitz Hill to the Asan Bay Overlook, then down to this marina-type area, then finally home. And no, the photos aren’t up yet, but I will put at least some of them up over at DZER’s Guam Pics over the rest of the weekend. There ARE some newer photos up over there, so go take a look. Now! Go! Then come back here! I know, I know … some of you are like, “Screw you asshole! I’m not listening to you!” But some of you are like, “Oh, I like it when you’re forceful and demanding, DZER! *coo* I’m going right now, Big Boy.”

OK, probably none of you did that. So sad. I need to get laid!!

SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY!!
I originally planned to stay up really late and sleep in most of the day tomorrow, which is Sunday for me. There are many things I could do. I could have set up a tee time and gone out and smacked golf balls around. I could go to brunch with some friends and gorged myself on a vast spread of delightful foods, not to mention free champagne and/or beer/wine, for hours on end. I could go on a nature hike.

LMAO.

Sorry. Sometimes I just keeeeeeeeeel myself.

I could go to find that puppy everyone’s on my back to get. There were some ads in the paper for a few different cute, cheap mutts. Hmm.

I could finish up the cleaning, boxing, trashing of old crap in my apartment, so that when I end up moving, locally or otherwise, I’m better set to go. Acutally, going to do some of that tonight. Gonna sort through my books to see which I keep, which I try to sell (all the Dilberts and Calvin & Hobbes books, I think), and which I donate to the library or a school. I’ve already packed away some photos/frames. Need to also sort through my knickknacks and decide which little statues, candle holders and various brick-a-brack will stay and which will go, either sold or trashed.

Anyway, so what will I be doing Sunday?

Playing poker.

For free.

My landlord is staking me to a $300-some buy-in Texas Hold ‘Em tournament. If I lose, he loses his money. But he has faith in my ability. If I win, he gets his entry money back and we split the winnings. First place will probably be somewhere around $1,200 to $1,500, maybe a little more.

I’m soooo excited. Think I’m gonna play a little bit online to practice. LOL

SOME UPDATES
• OK folks, first off, I’d like to welcome the newest addition to the DZERettes: Tara Tainton!! Everyone give her a nice, warm, welcoming spanking. I’ll get things started … ***SPANK!!!***

Heh.

• You’ll also notice — well, maybe you won’t; who really does? LOL — some updates the sidebar. There are some new links to some bloggers. Also, find out the movies and DVDs I’ve watched recently. I don’t know why you would want to know what I’m watching, but hell, I’m willing to share it. You can also find out what I’m currently reading and the recent things that I’ve read. Again, not sure why/if you wanna know, but it’s there.

Hmm … perhaps I should start recording time and texture of bowel movements? LMAO … hooo … I keeeeeeeeeeel me! Nah. You guys don’t want to read THAT … do you? LOL

I will share that twice in the last week I have had instances of the perfect shit … the smooth passing of fecal matter that ends with the asswipe with no shit on it! Yep, the perfect amount to squeeze out, leaving no trace of befoulment behind.

Wow … that really WAS too much information, no? But I HAD to share it with someone, since it did happen twice over the span of several days! LOL

• As mentioned earlier, there are a few new pics up over at DZER’s Guam Pics. So, just in case you didn’t go look up higher, you have another chance! LOL

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• According to the Central Intelligence Agency, Guam has 977 kilometers worth of roads — 962 kilometers of it paved, 15 of it unpaved. For the non-metric friendly, that’s 607.1 miles of roadway — 597.8 paved and 9.3 unpaved.