tnt ... ka-blam!

Well, on Guam the hour is fast approaching. Yep, not all that long from now, it will be midnight here. That means it will be Thursday. And that means, as all good (and bad) blogger guys and gals know by now (and if you don't, how uncool are you? Answer: Very!), Thursdays means Half-Nekkid Thursdays!

On Guam, Half-Nekkid Thursday starts before most of you are beginning your Whatever Wednesdays™. And for me, your Half-Nekkid Thursday flops well into my For Fuck's Flippin' Freaky Fritada Fridays™.

The reason for all this meaningless meandering? Well, as faithful blog readers (up to five or six now! woohoo!!) know, I am a fat guy. That's not a value judgment — it's a medical fact. Well, medically, technically, the term is "morbidly obese" which translates from the Latin to "Scary Fuckin' Fat." Anyway, this text should show at the top of your browser. The HNT — which just might be TNT, or Too Nekkid Thursday — pic will be a little lower down. If you have a queasy stomach, or if you don't want to be involuntarily subjected to a large, half-nekkid man, you have the option of getting out now.

There. Verbal warning delivered.

Without further ado: DZER's got back ... a BIG back!!



As an added "bonus" (Warning: the word "bonus" might not mean something good that's extra and free, depending on your personal definitions), I've included a closer pic of the hat (I love the Big Daddy gear) and the spiked collar. Consider it a little extra post-Halloween thang. Oh, and forgive the smarmy grin. I was filled with the spirit of smarm. Or is it more a smirk? Hmm ... a question for the philosophers.

If it looks, smells and tastes like meat ...
I think I've discussed this before in my blog — WAY back in the early days (couple months ago) when pretty much no one but me read my blog (maybe one or two others), but it came up again today at the office, so I'd thought I'd re-rant about it. Here goes:

What is up with vegetarian food that's made to look like, smell like and even taste like meat?

Now if you're a vegetarian, that's your personal choice. I don't hold it against you. I don't begrudge your decision to not eat meat. It's cool. I don't understand it, really, but I get that it's your life and you can live it like you wanna live it. I'm magnanimous like that. LOL

But if you've decided to give up meat, why would you want to eat food that looks like meat, that smells like meat and tastes like meat? Mushroomloaf that looks and tastes like meatloaf. Veggie burgers that look and taste like hamburgers. Soydogs that taste and look like hotdogs.

If you really want the taste and texture and look of meat ... how about you eat meat? Why torment yourself with the hypocrisy? Why not just cook a bunch of mushrooms in a pot, or put sliced vegetables on bread, or slice up some tofu onto a bun?

It's like a guy who decides — for whatever reason — that he will no longer have sex with women. So he mostly sleeps with men, but every once in a while he bangs a post-op transsexual. Looks like a woman, fucks like a woman ... but it's really a man he's fucking, so it doesn't count. WTF?

Oh, and another thing. If you're vegetarian, fine. But please don't try to preach to me, to convert me. I don't like people of some different faith trying to actively convert me to their faith, and don't want you to try your best to sway me to the vegetable side of the force. Also, don't try to convince me that I'm murdering poor cows, chickens, pigs, etc., in an effort to turn me off meat. It won't work.

Look, I don't try to convince you that humans, like bears (bonus trivia) are born omnivores. It's proven by our teeth. Some teeth are meant for tearing and rending flesh. Some teeth are meant for chewing up vegetables. We can live on mostly meat diets. We can live on mostly vegetable diets. Basically, we're very adaptable to the kind of food we can eat and not dependent on any one major kind of food source. But I don't shove that scientific evidence down your throats and make you swallow it like a big hunk of deep-fried beef. So please don't try to cram yer militant vegetarianism down my craw either.

HEAD'S UP!!
• If this is your first trip here in a couple days, please feel free to scroll on down. This was a four-post Wednesday. Either I had a lot to say, or I was bored. You choose.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• The diet of the ancient Chamorros was one primarily consisting of seafood, fruits and vegetables. Why? Because the only mammal indigenous to Guam and the Marianas, other than humans, is the fruit bat. And yes, they ate those when they could. And still do (not the endangered ones. OK, sometimes the endangered ones). It's actually tasty ... once you get past the fur.