Friday, August 26, 2005

Well, when I was your age ....

Some of the best things I can remember when I was a kid:

• Drinking gallons of cool water right out of the hose after an afternoon of playing baseball, football, or some other game.

• The ice cream truck on a blazing summer afternoon.

• Christmas morning.

• Saturday morning cartoons.

• The last day of school.

• The first time my relatives let me help slaughter a pig for a family fiesta.

• Buying a comic book with the quarter you found in the playground.

• Jumping off swings for distance.

• Birthday cake and ice cream.

• Dressing up for Halloween.

• Pretending that the living room carpet/floor was lava and having to jump from chair to couch to table.

• Kool-Aid.

• Playing with the family dog.

• Being allowed to go to the movies without parents for the first time.

• Camping out and going fishing with my dad and brother at the crack of dawn.

• My dad drawing cartoons for us.

I'm sure you guys all have your favorite/fond remembrances.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• In 1950, President Harry Truman signed the Organic Act of Guam into law, finally granting U.S. citizenship to Guamanians. However, those rights aren't guaranteed under the Constitution, only under an act of Congress, and thus can be changed at any time Congress feels like it. Guamanians aren't allowed to cast a vote for president, have no representation in the Electoral College, and don't have a voting member in Congress.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

a little too keyed up

OK, tonight is a night that I go out to support single mothers and the fine work that they do.

I'm something of a horndog (someone will scoff at the "something" qualification, I'm sure) and I need a certain degree of interaction with a sexy woman in various modes of undress now and then. I need to talk a little dirty, or be talked to a little dirty.

I've been painfully short of that lately, with little hints but just not enough. So it's time to visit some of my favorite women, women who will, for the price of a drink or a few dollars at the stage, treat me like I'm desireable and sexy. I know it's not real and meant, so do they. No pretentions, just pretend.

And sometimes pretend is damn good enough.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:

• For centuries the water buffalo, or karabao, in Chamorro, were the primary farm implement after the machete and fusiƱa (hoe). At one time there were several thousand karabao, but now there are only a few hundred — a few living on a farms and others running "wild" as a herd in southern Guam. Adult karabao weigh as much as 1,800 pounds and live to be about 18 years old.

Creatures of the Deep ...

For allison, some of the freaky fish found deep underwater ...

the angler fish ... with glow-in-the-dark technology

the bathysauraus

the viper fish ... man is this one scary or what?

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

who's happy?

One of the greatest documents ever also contains one of the greatest truths ever. The U.S. Declaration of Independence states that we all have a right to "life, liberty and the PURSUIT of happiness."

We have an absolute right to be alive. We have an absolute right to freedom.

But we only have the right to pursue happiness; nothing guarantees happiness, or even our right to be happy. We're only guaranteed the ability to TRY to be happy. And I think this is a good thing.

Even religions don't really guarantee happiness. Most of them say you have to live a certain way to achieve eternal life in heaven, or its equivalent, but even then they don't say that eternal life will be filled with happiness. And the way you have to live to reach that goal often means forsaking or sacrificing personal happiness.

And who really wants to be happy all of the time? How are you able to appreciate, fully appreciate happiness, if you don't have some sadness or adversity in your life?

I don't really expect to be happy, per se. But I do appreciate the little moments of happiness. Watching a great movie and forgetting about all of my problems. Enjoying an amazing meal. Laughing with friends. Winning an award unexpectedly. Finding a $20 bill on the sidewalk. Kissing a woman with soft lips. Hugging my godsons.


Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• Guam is the only U.S. territory to have its own Olympic team, separate from the U.S. Olympic team. Our first Olympic endeavor was actually a Winter Olympics, after a con artist convinced island sports leaders to let him represent the island. Now Guam's Olympic efforts are real, though we haven't ever won a medal and it'll probably be a LONG time before we ever do win one.


Guam 5, Mexico 3
SOUTH WILLIAMSPORT, Pa. (AP) — Sean Manley hit a two-run single to highlight a four-run fifth inning and Trae Santos struck out nine batters to lead Mangilao-Barrigada, Guam, over Mexicali, Mexico, 5-3 Tuesday at the Little League World Series.

Guam (3-0) earned a berth in Thursday’s International semifinal round against defending series champion Willemstad, Curacao (2-1).

Santos allowed just six hits and struck out the side in Mexico’s final at-bat to secure the victory.

Guam, the Pacific champion, trailed 3-1 going into the fifth inning when Calvert Alokoa walked and Eric Alcantara reached base on an error.

Santos walked to load the bases and Manley followed with a two-run single to tie the game at 3. But a throwing error on the play scored the go-ahead run and a wild pitch allowed the final run home.

Mexico scored in the first on Julio Arciniega’s single and a Guam throwing error. Mexico made it 3-0 in the third when Arciniega doubled in one run and Carlos Camano added an RBI single.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

haiku. gesundheit.

whisper sultry soft
with pouting petal-soft lips
but louder this time

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• The average low temperature for Guam ranges from 74.7° to 77.2° Fahrenheit. The average high ranges from 85.4° to 87.8° Fahrenheit.

Monday, August 22, 2005

peekalicious ...

I am an inveterate peeker. I like to steal a glance at a woman's cleavage, then sneak a longer peek. I like to surreptiously admire a woman's bra through the gap between the buttons of her blouse when she's sitting just so. I love a woman in a tank and other cleavage-generous tops. I adore a woman who wears something sheer, or semi-sheer. I get a little nuts when a lady leans over, revealing the tops of yer tits over the lacy edge of a Victoria's secret bra.

Oh, and I LOVE (and constantly crave) the nipple slip. It's a rare, wonderous and amazing happening, and is therefore treasured, almost worshipped.

I also admire a nice ass and long, slinky legs. But I'm a breast man. It's my favorite part of the chicken and my favorite part of a woman's body. Ask a male what their favorite piece of chicken is. Then ask him what body part he likes most on a woman. Odds are, the two match. Watch out for those who like chicken feet.

Anyway, back to my point, if you want to call it that:

Why does my prediliction toward peekage make me a pervert? Why do I get such dirty looks in the very rare instances in which I get caught looking?'

After all, if women wanted to ensure that I, or anyone else, didn't get a good peek at their decolletage, their cleavage, the tippy tops of their tits, then why did they wear a top that gives everyone said good peek? The whole point of wearing a cleavage-baring top is to showcase the cleavage, yes? Just like a miniskirt is a way to showcase the legs.

So why shouldn't I peek? Shouldn't they feel good that I'm peeking? That they're peekworthy? That someone admires their assets enough to leer a little, to ogle a bit? I think my peekage should be considered a compliment.

I'm NOT pulling their tops down or off or askew to get my looks. I'm not forcing them in any way, shape or form. I don't sit under stairs or bleachers. I don't peep through windows or fence holes. I don't put cameras under desks or anything like that. I don't take pictures and post them on Web sites.

I'm just looking. If a particularly revealing woman is in my field of vision, I look. If she moves on, it's not like I stalk her to get more. I take my little peeks and file them away in my memory. No harm, no foul ... right?

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• In ancient Chamorro society, when children reached the age where they became young men and women, they would leave their family homes and go to stay in special community huts, where they were trained/educated in the arts of love-making. At least they knew that when they hooked up with someone, that someone would know what they're doing in the sack!

Sunday, August 21, 2005

More e-mail sharing ...

Female Prayer

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.

I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.

Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.

Male Prayer
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac
with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a boat.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

Confucius says ...

Too uninspired to write, yet again. And, yet again, sharing e-mail funnies with ya:

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

Man with one chopstick go hungry.

Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

Panties not best thing on Earth! But next to best thing on Earth.

War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• While ancient Chamorro men were skilled warriors, fishermen and master navigators, the women were the heads of the household. That's right, the ancient Chamorros were a matriarchal society, with the women in control of most aspects of family life, inheritence and property.