Saturday, November 26, 2005

another short one

woke up early thanks to a combination sex dream and leg cramps. will definitely be writing an erotica piece later. based on the sexy dream — not the leg cramps!!

went into office early to get shit out of the way so I wouldn't be rushed going to this wedding. My computer/log-in was fucked for two hours before a techie finally came in and fixed the shit. So 2 hours at work totally wasted. I basically did the bare minimum for tomorrow's paper, which means coming in sunday to finish shit up. shit.

still have to iron slacks and shirt. lucky I have one pair of black socks left. I'll see about taking photos of me all gussied up.

for now, I leave you with the following video image, shot at the rehearsal dinner at a local hotel. It's from the polynesian/micronesian dance show the hotel puts on.

View this clip on Vimeo

damn. I need to get me a hula/tahitian dancer. look at those fucking hips go! she would break me ... but what a way to fucking go!!

peace ... i'm out!

Friday, November 25, 2005

short one

OK .. I'm running late.

I got poker in 10 minutes.

I still have to write two edits when I get home.

I have to edit several letters/columns for the weekend.

I have to prep my material for when I emcee a wedding tomorrow.

I have some fun pics and video to post ... sometime soon.

I need sex. It's been too long.

Just saying.

Going now. Should be more here later.

Miss me? Prove it. ;)

*so far gone*

Thursday, November 24, 2005

back in black ...

This blog started out, way back when, so many months ago (July — has it been that long?) ... and now it's black again.

It's black to fit my mood. I'm feeling a bit morose and bereft. I'm feeling black.

My blogosphere has been changed. Nothing I can do about. No way to change it. I accept it.

But it has affected me a little. I'm in somewhat of a state of mourning. That means black.

Now don't get freaked out. No one has died. But some things are gone and it doesn't look like they're coming back.

I don't want to go into any real detail, out of courtesy and respect, so please don't ask for further explanations or explications. Please just accept, OK?

The buttons are gone and I don't think they're likely to return. They're not destroyed; they're just gone. If you would like the button I made of you, if I made one of you, to put up on your blog or just to have, let me know via e-mail and I'll send it along to you.

I'm not feeling up to posting anything of depth or substance or even any empty filler.

There is a fresh piece of erotica on DZEROTICA that I just posted yesterday, if you haven't noticed already. If you haven't been by DZER's Guam Pics in the last week or so, there are some relatively new pics there. I have some more in my camera that need to be edited; might get around to that a little later.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• When a Chamorro Catholic on Guam dies, we hold nine days of the Holy Rosary before his or her burial, and a nine days of the rosary after. Old-school, traditionalistic Chamorros hold public rosaries the first nine days, one at lunchtime, the other in the early evening. The night before the funeral is an all-night wake. Sometimes, more and more these days, there is just one rosary said daily. The nine days of nobena following the burial are for close family only. More on rosaries later.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

The early HNT from Guam ...

It's aerial Half-Nekkid Thursday!

Well, it will be in a about a hour and 20 minutes. So sue me.


feeling better ... and one more thanksgiving story

Thanks, everyone!

I'm feeling much, much better today, thanks to generous amounts of drugs. Antibiotics, the generic forms of Allegra and Sudafed (decongestants), Aleve, Advil Cold & Sinus, Orajel for the tooth pain ... I guess I have to say goodbye to my Olympic dreams — I'm way too doped up to pass any kind of drug screening.

So I'm all set for Thanksgiving here. My plan is lunch at a friend's place around 2:30 p.m. ... the office feast at 5 p.m. ... then Ri's family's big dinner around 7:30 p.m. I will be taking plastic containers to all feasts in order to stash extra food for the rest of the week and into the weekend! LOL

Thanks to everyone who suggested remedies — especially Aroused Girl, who alerted me to the fact that I like had sinusitis! yer a lifesaver, darlin' ... and you are now linked from the Diatribe! :)

And my thanks and appreciation to all of you who stopped by to wish me well and to say get better soon. I *heart* all you sappy fuckers!

DZER's Thanksgivings of yore

When I was a young kid and my dad was stationed on Guam, Thanksgivings were the best.

Guam fiestas are gigantic food orgies. I don't care how big of a party with how much variety of food you've been to/had, but nothing compares to a old-school Chamorro fiesta — NOTHING!! Especially for the kinds and varieties of food available.

So picture that, PLUS all the fixings of Thanksgiving, at you'll get what went on the tables at a George family Chamorro Thanksgiving. We generally went to a beach — the old NCS beach was a favorite; now it's called Tanguisson and its waters are generally polluted ... it's gone to shit since the military turned it over to the local government.

So we'd get there first thing in the morning. Some of the foods were cooked the day before, or early in the a.m. the day of, all of the barbecue and stuff was cooked that day.

Here's a general sampling of the food that was available: Red rice (Calrose rice cooked with achoté for flavoring and color); dinner rolls, corn and flour titiya (tortillas), local yams and/or taro, potato salad (my aunties made awesome Chamorro potato salad!), chicken kelaguen, beef kelaguen, shrimp kelaguen — kelaguen is meat that is cooked mostly with lemon juice; beef is raw meat with black pepper, onions and hot boonie peppers cooked entirely by the lemon juice; chicken has same ingredients, plus shredded raw coconut, cooked about halfway to three-fourths through and finished with lemon juice; the shrimp is raw and cooked completely with lemon juice ... sounds nasty, tastes fucking sublime!!

Damn I'm fucking hungry.

Then you have other kinds of salads: sometimes macaroni, one with cucumbers and daigo with kimchee base, kimchee (regular cabbage kind), seafood salad with the fake crab, sometimes even regular vegetable salad.

Meat: Chamorro-style barbecue chicken and ribs — soaked in a soy sauce/vinegar marinade before grilling — plus a variety of grilled fishes, depending on what was fresh/caught — barracuda, parrot fish, tilapia, other reef fishes. Little tiny fish (mañahac) mixed with vinegar, hot peppers, onions. Then there's usually fried chicken also, and dried beef (another Chamorro specialty). Sometimes there's a dish where we take the entrails of the pig and slowly smoke them over a hot fire for hours and hours.

We also always had at least one pig slowly roasted for hours and hours over a fire, slowly and constantly turned by a succession of uncles and older cousins trusted enough to turn the spit. Sometimes there was a steamboat. And my uncle cooked up this deep-fried roast beef that was to die for — crispy and super well-done on the outside, medium rare on the inside. Sometimes fried fish as well. Pancit — a noodle dish. Fried lumpia — our version of an egg roll, basically. Eel soup — a greenish soup. Spinach cooked Chamorro style.

That's most of the main food dishes that I can remember.

Of course, that doesn't include the roasted turkey(s), baked ham(s), sweet potatoes, mashed POTATOES (happy, gigi? LOL), giblet gravy, corn on the cob, homemade bread — white and wheat — as well as stuffing and dressing.

And I'm fucking starving.

Dessert was pumpkin pie, apple pie — both homemade by my mom, who rocks the pies like you wouldn't believe — with vanilla ice cream and/or cool whip for topping. Red velvet cake so moist and delicious it would make YOU moist! (not you, Mike. well, maybe). Custard pie. Latiya — a Chamorro dessert that is totally killer. Potu — sweet rice cakes, basically. Cheesecake — cherry and blueberry topping. Fruit salad. O. MY. GOD ... the fruit salad was some of the best in history.

I seriously need to eat.

So basically all of us kids would play in the sand, in the ocean, in the jungle. Swimming, horsing around, catching hermit crabs and racing them. Some cousins would free dive spear fish with a Hawaiian sling — we gots water skills like that — to either add fish or octopus to the table. After we got all worn out, it was time to gorge.

There's a certain trick to stacking a fiesta plate. You need to work with a solid base and then stack your way upward. You have to plan your attack — what you're going to eat, what you want — or you will run out of room. Not to mention you might end up wasting valuable and very tasty food. You stuff yourself. Wait an hour, because that's what they told you to do back in the day, then you hit the water again. Then you came back for more food.

Pack up in the late afternoon when it starts to get dark, clean up the trash, then head home.

How do you beat that?

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• Every village on the island has at least one annual fiesta to celebrate its patron saint; some have two. Walk through any of these villages on the day of its fiesta and you will get invited to come and eat, even if you know no one at the place. This is especially true in the south. Many villages also have sister village relationships with military units/squadrons. It's always fun to watch some 19-year-old who's never been out of his home state before come to Guam and then get roped into a fiesta. They're always surprised with how friendly villagers are, how good the food is, and how they're "forced" to take home food. If you don't leave a Chamorro fiesta with a food plate, you snuck out. LOL

i still be illin' ...

Got in to see the doctor this morning.

He agrees that it's like a sinus infection. Got antibiotics and two different meds for congestion.

So why do I still feel like crap? I hate the toothache part the worst. That just bites. What if it's really a toothache coinciding with the sinusitis?

And why does this have to happen Thanksgiving week? Fuck.

The doc said that if I don't feel a lot better tomorrow morning to call him and he'll set up an X-ray. I'm guessing that's not good. When they have to X-ray your head, it's a bad thing.

Speaking of teeth and Thanksgiving ... you guessed it, yet another story.

So one Thanksgiving week I had a wisdom tooth that was fucking killing me. I was with a different dentist than my normal guy, who rocks even though I hate going, because work changed health insurers.

I ended up going to a butcher. Fucker. He pulled the tooth, but part of one of the legs broke off. He kept trying to dig it out. Unsuccessfully. On the day before Thanksgiving.

So I end up with a fucked-up mouth on the best day of the year to eat. Plus, he schedules me for a specialist oral surgeon to dig the remainder of the tooth out ... but since it's Thanksgiving weekend, I can't get in till Monday. Bastard. Butcher. Fucker.

By the time I get into see the oral surgeon Monday, he tells me the wound has healed and that it would be more trouble than it's worth to cut it open to go after the tooth shard, especially since it wasn't bothering me.

I just know that, at some date in the future, that's gonna come back to bite me on the ass ... like it will erupt out of the side of my mouth like a boar tusk or something.

Pray for a miracle, people. I need to feel mucho better when I wake up or this Thanksgiving will officially suck major ass.

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• You're shitting me, right? C'mon! I'm in pain and I'm sick and ... bleah. Deal with it.

Monday, November 21, 2005

the thanksgiving that almost wasn't ... and bees, bees, bees!!

It's officially the week of Thanksgiving and, as promised, I will now present to you, my loyal blog readers (up to 6 or 7 by now for sure!) two tales from Thanksgivings past.

The Thanksgiving That Almost Wasn't

The newspaper is very cool when it comes to holidays, especially Thanksgiving and Christmas. For employees who have to work the actual holiday, there is a tradition that they are fed holiday feasts. The food is catered, but still usually pretty good; it's a token measure for those who have to work, but a nice token.

One year though, it almost didn't happen. We'd just got a new managing editor from the states, and she just didn't seem to get the Thanksgiving dinner thing. It was almost as if she was some kind of Thanksgiving Grinch.

I had my usual wonderful family Thanksgiving dinner at home — oven-roasted turkey, ham, mashed taters, giblet gravy, stuffing and dressing, mom's homemade cranberry relish, homemade bread, pumpkin pie and peach cobbler (the other kind of pie varied — there was always pumpkin, but mom usually made apple pie, peach cobbler or something else).

I had to work, so I drove into the office. What awaited me there was a sad sight. There was going to be no holiday feast that day. Apparently, the new boss thought that "feeding the workers" just meant that there had to be some food. Her choice of food: Sandwich fixings — bread, cold cuts and cheeses. For THANKSGIVING.

DZER to the rescue!! I called mom and let her know I was coming home for the leftovers. I drove back home, she helped me pack up everything — about half of the feast was left over — and I trucked it back into the office.

Thankfully, there's always only a small number of people working Thanksgiving — like 8-10 people. They couldn't have a lot of food and there wasn't enough for seconds, but everyone got a pretty satisfying meal, plus pie to boot.

It meant no leftovers at my house, which sucked cuz I love eating Thanksgiving food for days after, but I thought it was the right thing to do. And my coworkers sure were happy I made the sacrifice. The new boss was a little piqued at first, until someone graciously explained to her that sandwich fixings on Thanksgiving didn't cut it. She made sure that Christmas dinner was up to the newsroom's usual standards.

Thanksgiving, Typhoon and Bees

Typhoons around Thanksgiving aren't unusual for Guam. It's right during the high point of typhoon season for us.

One year, we had a big storm hit a day or so before the holiday. Power was knocked out islandwide for days and days. Luckily, my parents always insisted on a gas stove/oven, just in case of a typhoon or power outage. While some families were pretty screwed and had to eat KFC or had to try to find a hotel that was serving Thanksgiving meals, my parents were merrily cooking away our usual superb feast.

We even had a few family friends over. It was a great meal, as usual, eaten outside on paper plates.

After we all were done, my brother-in-law decided he was going to check his bee hives at my dad's ranch. He produces "Boonie Bee Honey" here on Guam and has hives all over the island, including, at that time, about a dozen or so at my dad's ranch. Bees made sense there because of all the flowering plants. They produced a fine grade of light honey.

My youngest brother and my sister's oldest boy decided to go with him to check on the bees. The brother-in-law just wanted to make sure the hives weren't destroyed and that the bees were OK.

We're all still sitting around, picking at food, eating a second or third slice of pumpkin pie with Cool Whip, just chatting and talking and enjoying each other's post-Typhoon company. The afternoon drifts on by ... and the three haven't returned yet. The ranch wasn't that far away, so we're kind of wondering what happened. That's when the phone rings.

They're all at the emergency room. Apparently, a few of the bigger hives got knocked over while they were checking them out and there was an all-out swarm! LOL .. It wasn't funny for them — they each got stung dozens of times. I think my brother-in-law was stung like 20 or 30 times on the head. They all finally got back for their belated dessert a couple hours later — with swollen and hurting heads.

The moral to the story: Stay and eat pie whenever someone says, "I'm going to go check on the bees." LOL

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• Honey bees are another species introduced to Guam from elsewhere. They are not native to the island.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

sick as dog ... and no ... I don't have the dog yet ... sheesh

OK ... here's the deal

I'm sick.

I smooched Mike the Hick, not knowing he had a cold.

Now I have a fucking cold. My head aches. My nose is stuffed. I feel all ... bleah.

On top of that, I have a persistent tooth ache. Nothing really bad, but a dull pain that comes and goes ... and then comes back. Sometimes very sensitive to cold or heat, other times not so much.

Which means going to the dentist the week of Thanksgiving.

Anyway, this post is basically to say that I got nothing for you today. Well, obviously there is something; it's just not up to my usual standards of brilliance. Yes, I'm arrogant. But you have to admit, I'm funny and I'm brilliant. So there. :oP

This isn't a plea for sympathy ... it's an explanation to the four loyal readers of my blog who would be lost if I didn't post something.

Even in my weakened state, as I sit here a mere shadown of my normal self, I still give. So here is the latest installment of Jingle George:

Jingle George mainbar

Jingle George sidebar

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• The Spanish Influenza outbreak of 1918 killed a lot of people on Guam. In fact, one entire village located near Pago Bay was almost completely eradicated by the disease.