Thursday, March 23, 2006

a post sure to piss off some ...

A lot of you out there are having to deal with a winter that won't go away. I know that what is usually sunny California (the centralish part) has had more wintry days in the last month and change than they did in December and January ... and I know because I was told by a chilly Minx. And when she suffers from the cold, so do I ... because she doesn't wear the nice cleavagey tops when it's cold! LOL

Anyway, I know a lot of you are dealing with snow, sleet, slush and freezing rain. Not to mention biting wind and way too cold temperatures.

I'm suffering from the opposite problem.

Yep, the days are just TOO beautiful — crystal clear blue skies, friendly tropical breezes, hot temperatures and high humidity that have you sweltering as soon as you step outside. So what's the problem (asshole, is the term I'm sure most of you would use LOL), is what you're probably thinking. Hell, that's probably the nicest train of thought — I'm sure many of you are being far more creative and vituperative with your epithets and cussing. LOL

Here's the problem: I'm missing out on all this beautiful weather because of that whole work thing. Yep, office job = not enjoying the tropical paradise outside.

I could be playing golf.

I could be at the beach, sitting in the shade and admiring the spunky, spritely Japanese office ladies prancing about in skimpy bikinis, looking for a good time on their little three- or four-day vacation.

I could be playing another round of golf.

My bedroom is nice and chilly, thanks to the air conditioner being cranked down to 64 degrees Fahrenheit ... and a fan blowing on high speed.

Step out into the kitchen to get a drink, sweltering.

Have to go to the bathroom to pinch a loaf, major sweating.

Don't you all feel sorry for me?

And just click on the weather forecast over in my sidebar: Friday weather for Guam — Partly sunny and very humid. Winds from the ENE at 10 mph. High: 85° F RealFeel: 95° F.

Holy cow!!

Random Guam Fact Of The Day:
• The record rainfall for any March on Guam is 9.3 inches. The record rainfall for one year is 131 inches.


Chrissie said...

95 *pfft* I cant wait until you move to Fresno and have 115 HA!

kiss it

DZER said...

I don't mind the heat ... well ... not too much anyway LOL

and bend over baby ... I'll kiss it ... and nibble it even ... heh ;)

Natalia said...

I am not one for extreme heat. FL right now is awesome... not too hot and not too cold.... LOVES IT.


Strumpet said...

That pic looks absolutely fabulous!

But, I do like variety in all aspects of life. And, one of several reasons I live in Chicago is... that we experience all four titillating seasons in one day.

However, the wind can definitely be a pain in my ass.

anonymoused said...

Dzer --

I'm a newbie for your blog. I was actually going to ask in reference to the previous post about your cars, if you have seen the new bugatti review ... two V-8 engines, 1000 brake horsepower, extremely fast, etc. But unfortunately, I couldn't find it when I wanted it. Just say if you'd like me to find it for you though.

On another note, and perhaps *slightly* to do with the weather in Guam, I wonder if you can set things straight about how what is generally referred to as "Thai massage" is practiced in Guam. Here is a clip (not of the real deal of course), that suggests Guam is home to such things -- (Read the comments, down a ways.)

Okay, so what I am wondering is, does Guam have *real* Thai massage? Not the steam and cream thing that became popular in Thailand after the release of the first Emmanuelle film, but the true, ancient way of doing it? If you can illucidate, it would be nice.

Also, just say if you'd like a clip about the car. I understand it's the fastest, most expensive sports car ever built to date. It looks like a stubby Audi.


Chrissie said...

I knew getting that clip to download would be a good thing... *L*

I don't have any info to offer about a "real" one but i wouldnt mind gettin one from that girl :D

ArtfulDodger said...

I once did some work in Bermuda many years ago and all the business people wore suits AND these dress shorts to work! Left early, took long lunches... just a totally different lifestyle in the southern lands. Even traveling down South in the US is like that. I think the north is cold so that somebody does the work around here for the rest of you slackers!! :)

But it was 25 degrees this morning, so any sympathy for you right now is very hard to come by. Sorry. Sweat away.

SignGurl said...

I too love all of the seasons and that's one of the reasons I stay in Michigan.

I just spoke to someone who lived in the Philipines for 2 years. She hated it and even had trouble with time since she couldn't refer back to seasons since it's always the same. No rainy or dry seasons. Blech!

Are you gonna feel sorry for us when it's 95 and the heat index is 110? I doubt it. So, no sypathy from me! *L*

terry said...

the problem is... THAT'S TOO DAMNED HOT!
especially with the humidity.

all these years in NorCal have made me even more heat intolerant than i was while growing up in SoCal.

give me a clear, 55-degree day anytime.

well, unless i'm on vacation...and WANT warm weather..

DZER said...

natalia: aha ... so you're Goldilocks then? LOL

strumpet: thanks darlin' ... and so sorry about that ass pain ... anything I can do to help you? ;)

anonymoused: I have heard about the bugatti ... the old bugatti royale is kick-ass for sure. And I've never experienced a Thai massage here; not sure if they are offered here ... but there ARE a lot of massage places here, and the "happy ending" is available at most LOL

chrissie: come over ... I think I can arrange a very similar chick to give you a very similar massage ... hope you don't mind me watching :D

art: ya poor frozen brain! LOL And Guam doesn't go the whole Bermuda shorts and suit thing ... always thought that was weird.

signgurl: true, tropical climates don't have the whole four seasons thing ... but most of us do have two seasons: Rainy, and Not as Rainy ... LOL

terry: too hot? probably ... unless you're playing golf ... LOL ... and 55? That works for me :)

Mike said...

I don't think I can properly express the venom this post has induced. Bastard!!

DZER said...

well, it's not my fault you live in wisconsin ... LOL ... how many days a year do you guys have in the 80s? Like 12?

then again ... you DO have the packers ... LOL

Chrissie said...

send me a ticket :oP

Shay said...

awww work does suck!

I spend all year freezing walking around outside to and from classes

and then beautiful summer hits and I'm stuck inside... >.<

JMai said...

Oooh vituperative! Nice.

I am not jealous... south Florida weather has been gorgeous. And like you, I'm stuck inside an office all day every day and rarely get to experience it.

You never can quite have it all, huh!

DZER said...

chrissie: if only I were a rich dude ... you would SOOO have the ticket.

Awww ... who am I kdding? Hell, if I had a credit card again, even with just enough credit for the purchase, you would have that ticket so fast it wouldn't even be funny. LOL

shay: yes it does ... and I don't envy your frozen tuschy!

jmai: glad someone besides me enjoyed "vituperative" ... LOL ... and as the Stones put it so well ... you can't always get whatcha want ...

kathi said...

No jealousy here... Not a fan of hot weather, or cold weather, lol. Like that right in between comfy weather!

DZER said...

kathi: I think a lot of folks are that way

so ... hit the powerball yet? LOL

Suze said...

Dzer, I can't play golf either. You know why it's too cold and wet. Oh, and the other reason I can't play golf. LOL.

So stop your moaning darlin. :D

DZER said...

suze: hmm ... and here I thought that you would love to hear me moan and would want me to keep it up as much as possible ... LOL

Strumpet said...

Oh, I can think of a few things...


yep, it's me.... said...

hang in there D, you;ll make it!

DZER said...

strumpet: do tell ... heh

velma: awww ... thanks hon :)